So.
Things are interesting as usual.
I figured out that I don't like to recreate home because that's where I had hard time in the first place.
Mike wants to have another roommate. YEEEEESSSS. That should take preassure off me to be his whatever.
Right now I am being a maid and pretty darn good. As Andy said: make house so immaculate that you become important. I am going to do that. Hopefuly I can stay here longer then.
I need to stay here and make money outside and pay my debts and put money aside.
I applied for medicaid. If I could get it, then I can forget about health ins. Health ins. is expensive.
Got to decide if to keep it.
I realised that I take critique as attack. That is threatening to me and then I shut down. (result of my mom's abuse) This is significant.
I still didn't figure out the Christmas for baby. I just know I have to do something.

Well, I am officialy jobless. Blah
I did make money yesterday cleaning Andrea's house.
Michael is trying to make peace with me. I am not so hot. But oh, well, lets see.
Shelter, calling my mom and afidavit are my today's goals.
How can I make more money?
Need to call Duckie and ask her to ask Zora for whoever's ph. number.
I am definitely going to enjoy being home with Bumpy.
I can "make up" what we lost when he first went to daycare. That was so hard.
Bumpy loves bathtub.
I am seriously concerned about him not having Christmas this year. Michael won't let us do Christmas here. This is a problem. I remember Xmas when I was two. The most magical Xmas ever. It's the first Xmas I do remember from childhood. I want to make it special. But HOW.
Another issue is matrasse (sp). I have to put it SOMEWHERE. Michael wants me to get rid of it. NO WAY. Anyhow, he offered me $200 for it. But I want to have it. So. Will see.

OK. we have some major development. Rich is a really evil guy. We all got that now. Duckie still has issues and I have slight attachement/ relationship issues. Duckie was kind enought to point that out to me but she also told me what to do about it. So that's nice. I have to learn to interact with multiple people.
Andy thinks that I am a "horrible friend" and I shouldn't ask him about his opinion but he still talks to me (which is what kinda matters to me).
Michael doesn't know anything.
Andy has the understanding that some lovers are just stupid. (in his life)
Duckie and Andy are still married but Duckie doesn't understand how close she was to losing it all!!!! She doesn't quite get it. Which is pretty amazing.
Bunch of stufffffff.
I have no idea what the future holds. And I am suppose to be brave and step out of my comfort zone and put myself out there and try a real friendship. Bllllaaaaahhhhh
Fear makes me sick to my stomach. blllaaaahhhhh